Fifteen years in a childhood paradise

not smiling any more. He had not given us any spew-bags, and the mess was all over the back of his plane. He soon landed. We staggered out of the plane like drunks, green and pale looking. Our unfortunate mishap was written all over our face, for everyone to see.

At that moment we didn't care. Just to have firm ground under our feet again was already comforting. We did not eat any lunch that day. The pilot had a job cleaning up. He had a quick lunch with my parents, and then came to see us.

"You can't become stuka fighters, if you get sick like that!" he said. "I don't think we want to be either," said Günter, still a bit shaky, but already feeling much better.

"Thank you very much for taking us up there. It was really great, before we got sick."

"Everything looks so nice from above. Thank you, and sorry about the mess."

"It's all cleaned up. Don't worry about it. Auf Wiedersehn." And he was gone. Ten minutes later, a stuka came roaring towards our house. At the last minute, the pilot pulled up the machine, and it flew over the house. We waved, but I don't think he saw us.

*

Reports from the war in Russia became more disturbing. After Stalingrad, Germany only won the odd battles. We heard in the news about 'heroic retreats', 'brilliant defences', and there always seemed to be an air of expectation. Rumours had it that a new weapon was in the making, which would decide the war in our favour. But following the names of towns mentioned in the news on the map, I could see that the German troops were definitely retreating.

More and more people were being called up into the army, following the proclamation of the Total War.

In July Horst came home on leave. He had been serving in France with his unit.

"I can tell you, you never want to go to war. It's terrible." We crowded around him near the rabbit hutch. Horst did not want to be overheard by any unwanted listener.

"I'm lucky to be in a regular army unit, but I can tell you, never get into the clutches of the S.S. They behave like animals. Some of the soldiers are okay, of course, but it's the leaders. They have no regard for other people, not even women and children. I've seen so much brutality, I never want to see it again. It's really terrible."

"But isn't it better in France than in Russia?" "In one way, yes, but in another, no. You see, there is no fighting in France, but the resistance is strong, and if you are not careful, they get you

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