Refugee in search of a homeland

"I don't know why, but I trust you, Heinz. You are the only one in this village, apart from my family and your father, who knows about it, and I would like this to remain so."

"You can rely on me, Dieter." From then on we became good friends. "Since Günter has been in the army, I had no one to share my thoughts and feelings. I need someone. Would you like to be a brother to me? I still think a lot of him, longing to hear from him, or about him. You see, I miss him very much."

"I always wanted an older brother. I think that would be wonderful." We kept talking until late in the afternoon.

"What do you think about the future of Germany?" Heinz asked me the next day, when he came to visit me.

"I don't know, Heinz. I still hope that Germany is going to win the war. You must have heard about the miracle weapon and all that."

"But Dieter, wake up! The Amis are nearly here, you told me that the Russki was close to Berlin, what is there left of Germany to win?"

"They keep telling us, not to give up. They kept reminding us of the end of the last war, when Germany capitulated, as they said, five minutes before midnight, meaning five minutes before victory. We don't want to repeat that!"

"I think you've taken far too much notice of Nazi propaganda. Look at the mess we're in now. All our major towns are destroyed by bombs. Centuries of culture and history just wiped off the face of the earth. There're thousands dead at the front and here from the bombs. You've lost your home, as have thousands like you. We've lost the war already, a long time ago."

"I can't see it that way. I'll have to think about it." "Why don't you talk to your father, he might help you." "Has your father been É against the Nazis?"

"Well, let me put it this way: he certainly wasn't for them. It was part of his job to keep an open mind."

"I never talked to my father about that." "You should."

My mind was made up. Tomorrow I would ask Vater. After breakfast I saw Vater: "How about going for a walk? It's such a beautiful spring day." "Where would you like to go?"

"To the forest." We walked and we talked. It was the first really serious and honest conversation I had with Vater. He shared with me all the doubts he had about the Nazis, how they nearly arrested him, because he had defended our butcher Szyfter from Stþeszew, and how they opposed him, because he would not give up his membership in the church. It all came as a great surprise.

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