Refugee in search of a homeland

I sensed that something was going wrong in Emersleben, but I didn't know what it was. It was not possible to ask plainly, as all the mail was said to be censored.

Early December I received this cryptic letter from Mutter:

"There are news which worry me very much: one is the sudden illness of Onkel Bernd Enckevort, whom the doctor sent away without delay. Tante Alice and Onkel Helmut visited him. I could have done it too had I not left earlier. Tante Ursel (his wife) and the two youngest were advised to join him. As he is now in a healthier climate one may hope for a quick recovery. These poor people have gone through terrible worries, you will understand how close to my heart this is. Tante Alice wanted to persuade Onkel August to get a referral from National Health to be sent to a sanatorium immediately, as he suffers from the same disease. I don't think this correct, in any case the disease is not as acute, and there is a possibility of improvement, if he works less. The doctor confirmed that. It is to be feared, however, that he could end up with a miserable life, without any joy. But to sit in a sanatorium without doing anything and to live just out of a suitcase, would certainly not be to Onkel August's liking. One would love to advise and help, but how and what? Tante Alice is in favour of the sanatorium and doesn't understand that it seems to Onkel August to be the more difficult choice. Tante Lotte (Mutter's friend, a librarian in Potsdam) is in the same position, and she would not even consider it." (27.11.52)

I knew the Enckevorts, cousins of Mutter, had a small farm on the east side of the Elbe. I also knew that Tante Alice and Onkel Helmut (Mutter's siblings) had just met Mutter in Berlin, so Onkel Bernd must have gone to Berlin with his family, into 'a healthy climate', meaning West Berlin. I then interpreted 'Onkel August' as meaning Vater, and 'sanatorium' meaning West Berlin. Tante Lotte had previously written of her troubles with the Communist regime, but that she would not quit and leave.

What should I advise? I had heard in the news of an ever increasing flood of refugees crossing into West Berlin via east Berlin. As long as that door was kept open, I felt there was a possibility for my parents to leave, but what if the border there was also closed completely by the Russians?

One thing I could do was to see if I could get a job lined up for Vater, for I knew that his main objection to coming to West Germany was that he didn't have a job there, and that for him to sit around and do nothing was worse than having to work himself into the ground under Communist slave drivers.

Three days later Mutter wrote:

"In addition to my last letter I also wanted to mention that you had offered to find a garden for Onkel August, with a garden shed. The

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