Refugee in search of a homeland

Meanwhile Vater had been able to get a job in Lübeck, in an agricultural produce firm. My parents were able to rent one room there. They had left Gerda in the care of Onkel Box and Tante Liesel in Braunschweig. During this time in Lübeck I visited them several times by train, and for Christmas Gerda came too and we were able to celebrate Christmas once again together as a family. It was difficult, though, to create the atmosphere we have had at home in Sapowice. Space was very cramped, but more perhaps than that was the fact that I had grown out of the magic of childhood years, that I had grown away from my parents and Gerda to some extent, and that Günter was still missing. I guess I was really ready to start my own life, having left the nest long ago. The more I thought about it, the more I longed to go to Australia, a new adventure, far away, to prove to myself that I could do it.

This became even more urgent, as the court case about my accident in June had drawn near. It came before the court on 19 January 1954 in Minden. Jürgen lent me the firm's car to take my solicitor there. As before, the solicitor suggested that I not attend the trial, so I waited outside in the car for the verdict. After a long wait he appeared in the door of the court house. He didn't smile.

"Bad news for you," he said, "the judge wanted to set an example with you. He found you guilty of negligent driving, and sentenced you to four weeks detention in jail. You will have to surrender your driving licence within three weeks. I have, of course, appealed immediately, but this appeal is not likely to change anything, and in any case it will not be heard before July."

"How is that possible? What am I going to do now?" "Didn't you tell me that you wanted to go overseas?" "Yes, I do, but É"

"I suggest that you do your utmost to leave the country before the appeal is heard."

"Is that possible?" "Of course. Once you are out of the country, no one is going to chase after you abroad."

"But I have nothing lined up yet, neither a job nor a place to go to." "It's up to you. I'm sorry about that, but that was the best I could do for you."

I was completely deflated. My worst fears had come true. I don't think I said a word during the whole trip back to Bremen. What could I say to Jürgen Siemering? Without a driver's license I would be no good to him. I resolved there and then that I would leave no stone unturned to get out of Germany. I would not go to jail. Once convicted, my record would be blemished and I would never get out. This verdict, more than anything else, made me even more determined to do everything in my power to go to Australia.

Jürgen Siemering seemed to be rather philosophical about the verdict.

257