The rainbow never sets

"Yeah," I admitted, "But only because he was late and they were getting restless. It's not a crime to feed his horses, is it?"

"You had better stay away from his horses. They are his pride and joy and he alone is responsible for them. He doesn't like anyone doing it, not even me. So leave him alone. He is a grumpy old man, and we all have to put up with that. I think you should go to sleep now, tomorrow you will feel better about it."

"But I can't work with Kothe. He has insulted me, and I will have nothing to do with him."

"Just sleep over it and see how you feel about it tomorrow." Next morning the girls and Heinz were walking around with knowing faces, but acting as if nothing had happened. I didn't say anything, but deep down I felt that they were happy that I got humiliated. They didn't like to share their life and work with a person who was going to attend a university later. I had the feeling then that I was never going to be accepted by them. I just had to make the best of it. From then on I counted the months, the weeks, and the days, as I was milking my cows, or cleaned out the stables, or swept the yard, still full of resentment.

It soon became obvious to me, that the devaluation of the Reichsmark and the separation of the two Germanies meant that I would not be able to do my studies in Göttingen. Vater did not have any money to pay for the studies, nor for living expenses, neither had I. There were no scholarships in those days and so I had to resign myself to the fact that I would not become a student of agriculture at the Wilhelm August University in Göttingen, where I had already been accepted for the autumn semester of 1947.

But what was I going to do? I felt very tempted to leave this farm there and then, but as I had agreed previously to stay for two years, I was reluctant to leave earlier. I felt bound, perhaps not legally, but morally, and Herr Hoffmeister had always done the right thing by me. I could not just leave, so I decided to wait for 1 September to arrive.

Looking back at my two years in Kerstlingerode I can say that I had benefited greatly, not only physically, but I had matured through some hardships and through the wise counsel of Herrn Hoffmeister. He had helped me to become more aware of the present, to see and perceive things around me, and to see the things that needed doing. I had become a far more practical man than I had been before. I had not learnt to become a small farmer, but a better person. My future would take me away from the land, which had been my dream until then, and plant me in a completely different environment, where I had to learn a new job.

I said good-bye to the Hoffmeisters and thanked them for what they had done for me. To the others I said farewell, but never gave as much as a nod to Kothe. I was glad I was leaving. I didn't want to spend the rest of my life on a small farm with people whose horizon didn't stretch beyond what their eyes could see.

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